My story: I am the mistress of my ex
November 15, 2009, 10:00
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Today’s story of Anoniempje is recommended by http://www.makinguplove.com , and was translated from the Dutch found at fashionata.be :
I’m in a very strange situation, had almost seven years a relationship with my sweetie and everything was perfect: we could talk about everything together, laugh, weep and our sex life was delicious. In the last years of our being together was all a bit routine and things got worse when he had terrible back pain following a hernia. .
I thought that if I see him happy hard enough it I would go over it because everybody can go through a little dip, right?
Every day I saw his health improving and feeling a little better But did not realise he was taking distance from me until that day (September 11, 2006, will never forget) when he told me that he felt nothing for me anymore.
My whole world collapsed, I could not believe that the man I loved so much had no more feelings for me.
But my misery started yet, we lived together in his house and I had naturally to get out. He gave me time but of course I could not live together under the same roof with someone who no longer had feelings for me.
So I went to live with my daughter who took very well care for me since I was quietly led to be a complete wreck. The next month I had to separate from my mother, she was in a nursing home and one weeks later she was deceased.
Sadness and sorrow melted together in my body and from that strong woman I once was, nothing left.
In November there was something positive, I had found a new job and threw me out there on. After a few months I had saved enough money to go live alone but it was very difficult for me: I was crying in my sleep and often lived on automatic pilot.
I tried everything to forget my lover to but I could’nt. Two years went by and we met again maybe 5 times and I can not tell you how many text messages I had sent him to say him I still liked him so much.
Those text messages remained all unanswered untill that week that I turned 50. Suddenly he invited me to his home to drink a glass And of course and I eagerly agreed. That evening he asked me what I expected of him. Of course I had my answer ready : I do not know it all, we now have our own life (he had a new girlfriend and my life was also okay) but I know one thing … I would like to make love with you one more time and share your bed.
Since then he visits me 1 times a week and I can tell you that he is very passionnated. The weird thing is that I feel well with this, I mean I tell to myself I only have pleasure and no responsability but I feel strongly such a relationship is an burden to my future life.
I Will let the time do his work for me and hope to meet someone who can deliver me from him. It will not be easy because my sweetie is deep down inside me. I never thought I could live that way …
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This made me cry. I understand your pain. It is difficult being a woman. We can’t just have sex, we make love. The only way I can see you removing yourself from his is realizing that you have the strength to maintain your confidence and stop having sex with him so that you can, instead, build yourself up for someone who will completely dedicate themselves to you in the future. I know that you can’t imagine anyone else–I understand your pain–but in order to live a healthy and successful life, you need to regain hope for your unknown future soul-mate.
This is just part of life. You’ll overcome and one day when you see your ex, you will feel nothing
Thanks!
Harley,
I’m living something pretty similar, and I know how hard it is to stop this bad habit to fall for them. I wish to have the strentgh to stop seeing him. I really took the decision to stop seeing him 2 weeks ago, but few days after, we had the news that is mother gonna was diagnose with colon cancer and she have one more yea to liver, and I’m still very close to her even if it is near 3years he left me. I’m not sure it is the right moment to do this move. I’m a bit lost.
To confuse women:
I think you should see and speak to his mother if you had some contact with here. It is not because you ended your relation with him, that you should not show compassion and empathy for his mother certainly if you feel close to here. You can of course explain to here to that you don’t have the same feelings anymore for here son. Best would be not to visit here as a couple, but just go visit here in the hospital alone.
Hope this helps,
David Norden, http://www.doyoulove.info